ok, so i was friends with this girl for quite a while. we have been pretty tight for quite some time. a few years ago, we sort of had a DTR. One day, after a long weekend staring at fire, which to me, is the equivalent of deep meditation. Anyways, I talked to her about my feelings, and basically, i got the standard line i've heard a million times before: she was flattered, but decided that she was not interested in me like that. funny thing is, we actually became better friends because of that. we were super tight after that and i loved spending time with her. it sort of just pulled the pressure off the relationship

So i have been in and out of some relationships, and now we are sort of friends again, well, we have been talking a lot more now than we did while i was dating people. anyways, she was talking to a good friend of hers who also knows me. this friend was asking why we never dated. she didn't really have a response besides what she had told me before. anyways, this friend's advise to her was that she just needed to kiss me to figure it out. so she told me about it the other day, and sort of put it out there, to see how i felt about it.

i don't really know how i feel about it. on one hand, i was once interested in her, and i think i still am, but what good will come of it? I pride myself on the fact every girl i have kissed has sincerely meant something. So, on the premise, that we are only doing it to test if our relationship will work, doesn't that make it fairly meaningless. But since i do care about here... does that make it meaningful?

shouldn't the people i'm putting my lips on really want me to put my lips on them? she's a really cool girl, but what if my superior lip locking abilities do woo her over... is that the story i would want to tell our kids... that we only hooked up, because I'm one hell of a kisser? and should she go the other way, do i really want to know with definitive evidence that my kiss sent her runnning for the hills?

or, is this just her cheap way to get play? i know almost every other guy on the planet would jump at the chance, but i don't really care for most of the guys i meet, so i'm quite proud not to be lumped in the same catagory as most of them.

so should i stay in the friend zone, or take my chances?

we'll see.